Dear Bitter Butch: Should I Teach My First Grader to Swear?


Dear Bitter Butch,

My son will be entering 1st grade in the fall and the worst swear word he knows is “poop.” Should I give him a heads up of words that some of his colleagues might start using soon or is this just silly?

– Dad

Dear Dad,

I’m going to answer your question; I am.

But first I want to tell you that you are not being silly. You are sweet.

I still remember sending my innocent children to First Grade. They were SO cute and little and innocent and I was utterly petrified. The world awaited.And sometimes the world can be really poopy.

Read the rest at bitter


My Confession

Youngest demanded that I pretend to chop his head off tonight and I obliged — both because I am the best mom in the entire universe and also because I kind of wanted to kill him because it’s 11 at night and he and his brother would NOT FUCKING CHILL OUT and go to SLEEP.
If I have ONE PARENT on the jury I will be acquitted, I said.
ME: Chop, chop, chop.
YOUNGEST: Well, at least I didn’t get aHEAD of the situation.
ELDEST: Ha ha! DEAD on, man. DEAD on.
You are no longer my children, I said, closing the door. You are no longer my children.

This letter broke my heart a little.

i-741507_640Dear Bitter Butch,

How does one reconcile loving oneself exactly as one is right now and knowing that one needs to do some fairly serious self-work?

– One, not with everything

Dear One,

Oh oh oh oh oh you ARE a Dear One. My heart goes out to you — because there is so much pain and confusion packed into this one short question, but also because I’ve asked myself this so many times. How do I love myself and fix myself, too?

Ain’t that the question?

Or maybe it isn’t.

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Help Margie tell her story!

7874119_1460756797-8059You guys my friend Margie Newman is setting up a Go Fund Me to get the sustained time she needs to write her memoir about growing up the daughter of a Holocaust survivor.
She is a gripping, tough, sensitive, funny and strong writer and I can’t wait to read this book. I hope if you have a few bucks you’ll help her out!
Here’s how she describes her book:
The Thing is to Always Be Ready is about growing up as my father’s daughter. My father, David Newman, of blessed memory, survived the Nazi ghettos, labor camps, and the notorious Buchenwald. His entire family, save for one brother, was murdered in the death camp Belzec. My father came through with his life, but in many ways, for him, the Holocaust was never over.
My book is the story of trying to straddle the worlds of trying to be an American kid that fit in, and hearing my father scream in the night as he dreamed about my sister and being with him as he was chased into the gas chamber.
It’s the story of me unraveling my father’s stories and his silences, and of the struggle to find balance between living in the present and honoring the past.