Youngest demanded that I pretend to chop his head off tonight and I obliged — both because I am the best mom in the entire universe and also because I kind of wanted to kill him because it’s 11 at night and he and his brother would NOT FUCKING CHILL OUT and go to SLEEP.
If I have ONE PARENT on the jury I will be acquitted, I said.
ME: Chop, chop, chop.
YOUNGEST: Well, at least I didn’t get aHEAD of the situation.
ELDEST: Ha ha! DEAD on, man. DEAD on.
You are no longer my children, I said, closing the door. You are no longer my children.
Haddayr Copley-Woods 
That’s awesome. Brandon loves PUNS.
From: Haddayr Copley-Woods To: night_sky_bliss@yahoo.com Sent: Thursday, May 26, 2016 12:06 AM Subject: [New post] My Confession #yiv0345067982 a:hover {color:red;}#yiv0345067982 a {text-decoration:none;color:#0088cc;}#yiv0345067982 a.yiv0345067982primaryactionlink:link, #yiv0345067982 a.yiv0345067982primaryactionlink:visited {background-color:#2585B2;color:#fff;}#yiv0345067982 a.yiv0345067982primaryactionlink:hover, #yiv0345067982 a.yiv0345067982primaryactionlink:active {background-color:#11729E;color:#fff;}#yiv0345067982 WordPress.com | haddayr posted: “Youngest demanded that I pretend to chop his head off tonight and I obliged — both because I am the best mom in the entire universe and also because I kind of wanted to kill him because it’s 11 at night and he and his brother would NOT FUCKING CHILL OUT” | |